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I had to ask for lube!!

March 20, 2022

You know things don't always go right on the farm....


Last Sunday afternoon, one of the last goat mamas finally delivered her baby. I was worried that perhaps there was a second baby that was stuck (she always has twins). 


She was pawing and digging at the ground as if something was wrong, which encouraged me to think that there was indeed a second baby still in there.


I asked Todd, our farm hand, to check on her in an hour while I went home to get ready to take the kids out for dinner.


Todd called me at 6:10 - he was worried about the goat, she was still behaving oddly. 


I needed to check to see if there was a second baby that needed help with delivery!


Reservations were at 7:00.... That meant that I had 40 minutes.


I hustled to the other farm with supplies, realizing that I didn't have any lubrication to help me out...


And, OMG, I had to ask Todd if he had any personal lubrication. Yes, that's right. Sex lube. When's the last time you asked someone, with whom you were not intimate, for such a thing??


I was mortified. 


I had to ask three times. Todd just kind of looked at me like I was whacked.


Why is the lube necessary? Isn't wet birth enough?


You see, I had to stick my hand into the goat to check for more babies... This is hard to do without some serious lubrication. I assure you that hands were not intended to go in there.


Fortunately, Todd had the goods, and I was able to get my hand inside of the poor goat and verify that there was not a second baby.


Mama goat is fine - I'm still not sure what all the stamping and digging behavior was about. 


It's a rare occasion when I have to assist with a birth. It's something I definitely prefer not to do, but when it happens, someone has to assist and I'm first in line to do it. I was glad in this case that I did not have to figure out how to manipulate the legs and nose of a baby goat into the correct position. It's not an easy task! I would probably have hauled the goat into the cab of my truck and taken her to the vet if there had been a second kid.

Amie Herrera

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